10/05/2006 03:32:00 AM
today's bible bowl.. had a great time w ying jiun n wai cheng at mid wk.. been a long time since we worship together.. crapped alot.. 3 of us got stuck w dat indian accent.. haha.. thanks to dat b'day treat ying jiun gave me b4 she left for he Gunung Tahan backpack trip at lil india.. my 1st time eatin such traditional indian food.. n their chilli is *wow*.. i cant take it.. when in e first place i cant take chilli too.. haha..went hm w ying jiun, spent 1 1/2 hr tog.. time juz fly past while we crap n talk abt how we've been.. i told her abt e ppl i've been trying to help, e challenges/prbs i faced.. seeked advice, how i can do better.. e time spent was fulfilling.. i acknowledged my feelings in a way... rather i faced my feelings i guess.. didnt understand why i always cant wake up on wed mornings, why i'll feel drained out even thou i'm outwardly focus.. i've been thinking ways n means to help everyone who's dear to me, giving my ears, emotional support n friendship to e frenz out dere n giving financially n emotional support to my mum n sis.. but i didnt go n think n look for ways n means to help myself too.. dat's not being productive.. thou i kept telling n reminding myself dat being outwardly focus, juz gif my best, god will gif me his blessings.. juz wait.. was really encouraged thou.. had a pat on e back, she said two words "awesome, perservere".. not oni do i get mid nite discipling time frm ching eu n chew ling, i gif mid nite "counselling", rather encouragements too.. but it ws a gd time.. at first i tot wat i said wasnt understood, n i'm made to b long-winded, repeating myself again n again.. haha.. thank god, blessed w e wisdom.. wat i said was understood.. hee.. didnt realise n expect dat i'll say wat i said.. tonite's conversation sounded diff frm other nites'.. dunno exactly where's e diff thou.. but ya.. juz diff.. may be it's more intense? solemn? serious? i dunno.. oso.. for a moment, i'm starting to doubt all these stuff abt psychology.. if one person really dun haf own concrete opinions, den wat's e LTA rank based on? haha.. aniw, ultimately, i encouraged n helped someone to stand up n fight again.. nv to gif up.. when i say those, indirectly i got hit too.. nv to gif up.. perservere.. wait n e blessings will be given unto u.. JIA YOU!!! ;)
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